Description
Welcome to the most exclusive, slowest-moving club on Earth. Snail Dad Social Club isn’t just a vibe — it’s a lifestyle. This unisex sweatshirt is your official uniform for tending tiny mollusks, embracing the pace of peace, and lovingly whispering “you got this” to a snail on a leaf.
Whether you’re a proud slime papa, a snail-curious cozy king, or just here for the weird wholesome energy — this is your sign to slow down and look fabulous doing it.
Membership perks: emotional support snails, dirt under your nails, and zero shame.
⭐ Product Features:
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- 🔄 Seamless Swagger
Knit in one piece using tubular magic—no side seams, no weird puckering. Just clean lines and good vibes. - 🧶 Ribbed Collar That Knows Its Job
Highly elastic and holds its shape like a champ, even after one too many “just five more minutes” snoozes. - 🧵 Double-Needle Stitching = Double the Sass Support
Reinforced in all the right places—shoulders, cuffs, neck, waistband. Tough love, sweatshirt-style. - 🛋️ Medium-Heavy Fabric = Ultimate Couch Companion
A cozy 50/50 blend of cotton and polyester (8.0 oz/yd²) that feels like a warm hug from someone who doesn’t talk too much. - 🏷️ Tear-Away Tag = No More Neck Itch Tantrums
Soft, pearlized, and ready to be ripped out of your life—like that one toxic ex. - 🌿 Sustainability with Style
Made with 100% ethically grown US cotton and OEKO-TEX-certified dyes. Good for your closet and your conscience.
- 🔄 Seamless Swagger
🧼 Care Instructions (Because You’ve Got Better Things to Do):
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- 🧊 Machine wash cold (like your iced coffee)
- 🚫 Non-chlorine bleach when necessary (but go easy, champ)
- 🔥 Tumble dry low (no high-heat drama)
- ❌ Do not iron (we don’t do wrinkle stress here)
- ❌ No dry cleaning (you’re not that high-maintenance)
