Description
You say you’re whimsical? Nay, prove it, peasant. This unisex sweatshirt is for the true jesters, mischief-makers, and chaotic good creatures of the realm who ride snails into battle (or brunch) with zero shame and full flourish.
Featuring a wizard with questionable credentials atop a snail with serious vibes, this sweatshirt is soft, cozy, and 100% certified in the ancient art of tomfoolery. Perfect for confusing strangers, summoning silliness, and reminding everyone that whimsy isn’t a vibe — it’s a lifestyle.
Dost thou qualify? Wear this and find out. 
Product Features:
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Seamless Swagger
Knit in one piece using tubular magic—no side seams, no weird puckering. Just clean lines and good vibes.
Ribbed Collar That Knows Its Job
Highly elastic and holds its shape like a champ, even after one too many “just five more minutes” snoozes.
Double-Needle Stitching = Double the Sass Support
Reinforced in all the right places—shoulders, cuffs, neck, waistband. Tough love, sweatshirt-style.
Medium-Heavy Fabric = Ultimate Couch Companion
A cozy 50/50 blend of cotton and polyester (8.0 oz/yd²) that feels like a warm hug from someone who doesn’t talk too much.
Tear-Away Tag = No More Neck Itch Tantrums
Soft, pearlized, and ready to be ripped out of your life—like that one toxic ex.
Sustainability with Style
Made with 100% ethically grown US cotton and OEKO-TEX-certified dyes. Good for your closet and your conscience.
Care Instructions (Because You’ve Got Better Things to Do):
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Machine wash cold (like your iced coffee)
Non-chlorine bleach when necessary (but go easy, champ)
Tumble dry low (no high-heat drama)
Do not iron (we don’t do wrinkle stress here)- No dry cleaning (you’re not that high-maintenance)
